Hello Reader,

The sheep are registering opinions about the recent actions taken by management.

Some of you might wonder about the idea of sheep even having opinions. I assure you, they do.

Exhibit A: Martin

Martin is generally a calm, quiet fellow. He rarely speaks, but he observes. Intently.

He recently watched a couple of his Merino ewe friends leave the flock for alternate lodgings. This week he first witnessed Wrestlemania, Ewe Stall Edition, while some hooves were trimmed. Then he watched all the Babydoll ewes trot out for their “personal growth” retreat with Mr. Bingley. (We have to be careful how we talk in front of the little ones.)

He has questions.

Exhibit B: The young lads

Greg has been working on Barracks 3 (the old/new chicken house) when he can squeeze out a few minutes. The first order of business was to stabilize the structure and frame the inside. (I think. I’m no structural engineer, and I think my sons would give me a C+ in Lego. Maybe out of pity and affection.)

I swear I am not making this up, but the wethers are obsessed with this project. Do they think they’re helping? Advising?

Or maybe inspecting.

Exhibit C: Mr. Darcy

Mr. Darcy has registered a polite but pointed protest.

He would like us to note that he is, as of yet, the only ram still without the present company of ladies. He would most respectfully request that we alter the proposed arrangements to remedy this untenable circumstance at our earliest convenience. At present, he is enduring the sufferings only a bachelor surrounded by happily engaged couples can know. The only consolation he can find is the company of chickens.

Greg's Got Questions

Thank you to those of you who participated in the poll last week.

This week’s winning question: How does your call from the “US GOV’T” experience compare to that time you were called by the “Federal Marshal” who demanded that you come to the courthouse on a Saturday to do whatever he was trying to convince you to do and was playing every card he had to convince a “slightly neurotic, people-pleasing, rule-following first-born daughter” that you were in BIG trouble if you didn’t?

Well, the first difference is that I was expecting the chick call. I was not expecting a call from a “Federal Marshal."

Here’s what happened.

Saturday morning (Clue #1), I got a phone call. Caller ID said “Federal Marshal."

Well, good grief. I’m hard-wired to answer that. It’s Someone In Charge.

This person gives me some sort of identification and then tells me (if I’m remembering this correctly), that I was supposed to testify as a witness and that now there’s a warrant (or something like that) out for me. I need to get down to the courthouse downtown by noon or I risk being arrested and fined.

Greg was out of the house at that moment, or I’d have put the call on speaker so he could have heard this, but the panic started to recede as I started realizing 1. It’s Saturday...there’s no court on Saturday in the judicial system I’m familiar with, 2. I haven’t been a witness to anything more serious than general rudeness in the last several months, and 3. I know for a fact The Government has my address and could have reached me by mail if they needed me to appear somewhere.

But MAN, this dude was persistent. I should have hung up. I really should have. But I think we ended up where he said his supervisor would call me. I was mostly sure this was nonsense, but still just a little afraid I was going to end up in the Big House.

Greg got home and took the call from “the supervisor” and started entertaining me with the best questions. He asked questions only someone local to the area could answer. BRILLIANT. It quickly became clear this was a scam. We never got far enough to learn what the actual scam was. They were still insisting I needed to show up downtown when the whole thing fell apart, but they sure went to a lot of trouble.

Honestly, the whole experience was a good lesson for me. I’ve heard so many phone scams that I think are so obvious and ridiculous, and I’m tempted to think I’d never fall for one. But this one happened to poke a sensitive spot and that’s all it takes to let fear overcome sense and make you think you should do something unwise.

This Week's Questions

(As a matter of procedure, the poll function takes you to another page to submit your vote, so if that happens to you, you’re on the right track!)

Question 1. Speaking of registering a protest with management, who authorized public distribution of a photo of my hindquarters? I don’t have a good side, but that’s definitely not it.

Question 2. Regarding Mr. Darcy’s formal complaint, what is the plan for starting his companionship period so we can have more construction project helpers like Fitz, Betsy, and Eliza?

Question 3. Is the gestation period for all our sheep breeds the same?

Happy knitting!

Kiersten J

P.S. Pemberley Correspondence is beginning its first season this fall. Each month I’ll tuck a handwritten letter and a few small pieces of Pemberley into an envelope and send them your way.

If that sounds lovely, I’d love to have you join us.

P.P.S. You can find this and more of my knitting journal entries at KierstenJ.com.

If you have any questions, please don't hesitate to reply to this email! I read every one!